When people talk about solo tabletop roleplaying games (TTRPGs), they often focus on the freedom, creativity, and personal satisfaction that come with being your own game master (GM) and player. The idea of creating and navigating your own world, without the need to compromise with a group, can be incredibly appealing. But for many, the reasons for turning to solo play aren’t always so positive. There’s an ugly side of solo TTRPG games and to why some players, especially women like myself, choose to explore these games on our own.
Prejudice and Exclusion in Group TTRPGs
One of the most disheartening experiences in group TTRPGs is facing prejudice and exclusion. These games, which should be about collaboration and storytelling, sometimes become arenas where bias and bigotry rear their ugly heads. For women, the experience can be particularly challenging. Misogyny and discrimination are, unfortunately, not uncommon in many gaming circles.
There have been times when I’ve joined a group with excitement, only to be met with dismissive attitudes or outright hostility. My ideas were brushed off, my contributions belittled, or worse, I was entirely ignored. It’s an exhausting battle just to have your voice heard in a space where the loudest voices—often male—dominate the narrative. This exclusionary behavior is one of the reasons many players, like myself, eventually turn to solo TTRPGs, where the only voice that matters is our own.
Ego and Control in Gaming Groups
Another unpleasant aspect of group TTRPGs is the presence of players or GMs with outsized egos. These are the people who see the game as their personal stage, where they can exert control over others and manipulate the game to their liking, often at the expense of everyone else’s enjoyment. For a GM, it’s supposed to be about guiding the story and ensuring everyone has fun, but some use their position to impose their will and inflate their egos.
As a player, I’ve encountered GMs who were more interested in showcasing their own ideas than in fostering a collaborative environment. This is especially frustrating when you’re trying to immerse yourself in the game, only to find that your choices don’t matter. Some players, too, can be overly competitive or domineering, taking the game far too seriously and making it an unpleasant experience for those who just want to have fun. These dynamics can be exhausting, leaving little room for the creative and collaborative spirit that TTRPGs are supposed to embody.
Jerks Who Want to Control How You Play
It’s not just GMs who can ruin the experience. Fellow players can also be a source of frustration when they try to dictate how you should play your character or interact with the game world. This often stems from an inflated sense of superiority, where certain players believe they know better than everyone else. They’ll criticize your decisions, question your roleplaying choices, and generally make you feel like you’re playing the game “wrong.”
This kind of gatekeeping is toxic. It strips away the freedom that TTRPGs are supposed to offer and turns what should be a fun, imaginative experience into something stressful and restrictive. It’s no wonder that so many players, tired of having to justify their playstyle or decisions, choose to leave the group or go solo, where they can enjoy the game on their own terms without judgment or interference.
Unwelcoming Communities and Sensitive Topics
Some gaming communities are just not welcoming. Whether it’s due to cliques, elitism, or general hostility toward newcomers, it can be incredibly difficult to find a group where you feel like you belong. This is especially true for marginalized players who often face discrimination or are made to feel like they don’t have a place in the gaming world.
On top of this, group TTRPGs sometimes delve into sensitive topics without proper consideration or agreement from all players. It’s not uncommon to find yourself in a game where the story suddenly takes a dark turn, touching on themes of violence, sexual assault, or other triggering content. When this happens without prior discussion, it can be deeply unsettling and make the game an unsafe space for some players.
As a woman, I’ve been in situations where the storyline included unnecessary sexualization—of myself as a player or the characters I play. There were times when I felt objectified, uncomfortable, and ultimately unsafe. This is not what gaming should be about. Solo TTRPGs, for me, became a refuge—a place where I could explore these stories without fear of crossing into uncomfortable territory or being forced to deal with sensitive topics I wasn’t prepared for.
Misogyny and Discrimination
Misogyny is, unfortunately, a common experience for many women in the TTRPG community. From the moment you sit down at the table, you’re often judged not by your skills or creativity, but by your gender. The assumptions and stereotypes are exhausting—whether it’s the belief that women don’t know how to play “real” games, or the expectation that we’ll only be interested in certain types of characters or stories. I’ve encountered male players who assumed I was there to “watch” rather than participate, or who were shocked when I demonstrated an understanding of the game mechanics.
This kind of discrimination isn’t just frustrating—it’s dehumanizing. It reduces you to a stereotype rather than recognizing you as a fellow gamer with valid interests and ideas. It’s one of the biggest reasons why I’ve found solace in solo TTRPGs, where I can engage with the game in a way that feels safe and empowering, free from the biases of others.
Unsafe and Excluded: A Common Reality
When you constantly feel unsafe or excluded, it’s hard to enjoy the game. I’ve had to deal with uncomfortable situations where my character was objectified, where I was talked over or dismissed, or where the game’s storyline ventured into territory that was triggering or uncomfortable. In these moments, I felt powerless and unwelcome, which is the exact opposite of what gaming should be.
Solo TTRPGs have been a way for me to reclaim the joy of gaming. I can explore stories that interest me, engage with the game world in a way that feels safe, and avoid the negative experiences that have plagued my time in group games. For many players like myself, solo TTRPGs aren’t just an alternative—they’re a necessity.
Conclusion
The reasons for playing solo TTRPGs aren’t always the ones we like to talk about. While the freedom, creativity, and personal satisfaction are all major draws, there’s also an ugly side to group gaming that pushes many players, especially women, toward solo experiences. Whether it’s dealing with prejudice, exclusion, or the egos of others, these negative experiences can make group TTRPGs a hostile environment for those who just want to enjoy the game.
As someone who has faced misogyny, discrimination, and unwelcoming behavior in group settings, solo TTRPGs have been a way for me to take back control of my gaming experience. It’s a space where I can feel safe, empowered, and truly immersed in the story I’m telling. And don’t get me wrong, I did have good experiences in some group games, but I feel like this is a worthwhile topic to be discussed, because I’ve heard so many horror stories about discrimination on group settings that I just wanted to give my two cents on that.
While I hope that one day these issues will be addressed and resolved in the larger TTRPG community, for now, solo play offers a much-needed refuge for those of us who just want to enjoy the game.